Just Walk Across the Room

I often struggle with the SaddleCreek / WillowBack Mega church models, methods, and ministries. This is the first book I've read by Hybels. It's a bit cliche but I like his "3D" evangelism model.

1. Develop Relationship

2. Discover Another's Story

3. Discern next steps

By Any Means Neccesary...

I do not believe the above statement. I think too often the church has let the ends justify the means. The means must be ethical, Godly, good and loving or the ends seems irrelevant to me.
Here are ways we grew the church this week. I feel comfortable with all of them.

We passed out thousands of flier invitations and placed them on doors. There is a fine line here for me. I am against putting things on people windshields. Yet somehow I think leaving a note, even a Xeroxed one, on someones door is moving towards a personal invitation, even when it's done anonymously.

We tried to treat service employees with dignity and respect. We tipped them well. And invited them to check out our community.

We gave away 750 bottles of water to movie goers, the swat team, to shoppers, and airport employees. Just a Random Act of Kindness... the bottles do have our church info but the gift comes with no strings attached.

We ministered to fifty kids in our community this week by means of gospel illusions, ice cream, games, cool crafts, prizes, songs, movement, stories, and fun.

A couple in our church gave birth to a beautiful baby this morning. This is our second newborn in three weeks. There is more than one way to grow a church.

I am so thankful for God sending a team from another church to help us with these, (accept for the last one). I am reminded once again the importance of living in and valuing relationship with others. Ministry flows out of relationship and we need each other.

Easter Timeline

We showed this animation at church on Sunday. We read outloud Gospel passages from "The Message" at the same time. It went very well. Made me think of a red framed childhood toy.

Thanks to VMG Backgrounds for producing such cool stuff and to worshiphouse media for helping me find it when I need it.

Undisciplined... and Wierd

I sleep as late as possible, no matter what. I went to bed last night at 11:30PM, thinking I would get up early and get a jump on my day. I woke up at 5:30AM. I handled some paperwork in the hall...er office, and noticed it was still dark outside. I went back to bed. I got up again at 7:30. Did a few of the things I was trying to get a jump on, showered, headed out, and arrived at work four minutes late. Granted, the fact that I was up and moving at 7:30 is a real testimony to where I came from. However, my inability to be the early worm (Is it the bird? I'm terrible at mixing metaphors.) makes me feel terribly undisciplined.

At our church we do a monthly outreach service, well, once a month. I work together on this with the young adults leader and the senior pastor. It seems like anytime I suggest something, they both look at me like I'm crazy. For November I chose the theme and scripture. This month our theme is Rhythm and the theme verse is from Isaiah 55; "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the LORD. I have had to explain this idea over and over again. Each one of us has a "rhythm" to our lives. The "rhythm" the world offers is much different than the "rhythm" God offers. Is this really that abstract? I guess so. Makes me feel like the wierd odd ball.

Saddleback...my eye witness account

For the first time ever, today I attended a regular service at a mega-church. Not just any mega church, the mega church. That's right we visited the multi-million dollar shrine to Rick Warren, Saddleback Church.

We arrived through Saddleback Parkway and we're guided by an array of red shirted, hat and sunglass wearing attendants directing us into the lower lot. The wife actually asked me... "Do you think we'll have to pay to park?" It really did feel like he had parked in the Lion King lot, especially when the tram pulled up. We probably should have skipped the tram but when the tram volunteers were shouting "main worship center", I assumed that was the place to be. Once in the fire pit area, that's where the tram stops, we hiked up some stairs and started following signs to the children's center. A nice member of the greeters team told me we needed to go back down a different set of stairs. While we were talking I saw a building labeled "Nursery building". Since it was at the same level we were I skipped the greeter dude's instructions and headed in that direction. Sure enough! It was the nursery building!... but 18months -24months were downstairs. We hiked down stairs and waited in line, gave her name, my name, my phone number, "Yes, I said 951", and got our retrieval sticker. This was a tad bit exhausting. Now to find where 3's and 4's go. We hiked past the cool rock maze, went by the 1yr old and 2 yr old classes, marched through the main kids ministry foyer. FISH! FISH! Nemo! Dory! FISH!, my kids shouted as we walked past multiple salt water aquarium walls. And finally we arrived at the 4 year old class rooms. While we were once again waiting in line, the wife says I think we should put them (our other two kids) in the same class. A very nice jersey wearing lady (their kid's ministry is called "All Stars") asked us if we knew where we were going. I explained it was our first time and we were just visiting. She then asked how old the kids were. At this moment I did what I think anybody else in my situation would have done...okay maybe not. I LIED, I said "they are both four". This seemed really justified in a Rahab sort of way. I just wanted my kids to be together, I wanted my wife to feel at peace, I just wanted to actually go to church and not have to go on another hike to find the 3 year old classes. Feeling the glare of my wife and fearing God, or maybe Pastor Rick, would strike me with lightening, I made a correction "actually she's almost four and he's almost five, but we would really like them to be in the same class, just for today". The nice lady asked my wife "When's her birthday?" "August", the wife says "she's only three", looking at me like I was stupid not dishonest. "Oh no, we can't do that...", I'm not sure what the lady said after this but it had to do with developmental differences, maybe you could work on this during the week, we have a family friendly venue, all of our handlers are finger printed. (I'm almost sure she said handlers and I think this label should be re-thought through.) My kids were instantly in tears and neither wanted to go to their class by themselves.

We headed back to the "main worship center" ...over the river and through the woods... only to find out that children under five are not welcome in the main worship center. We were directed to the new "Family venue" over there, down the stairs, see that tent?, not that one but the one behind it, next to the beach burger stand. The wife says, "I'm ready to just go home!". One of the nice greeter dudes must have heard her cause he chased us down and asked, "Can I suggest the family venue?" He gave us similar directions, leaning and pointing, omitting the burger stand proximity.

My wife has real issues with folks not allowing kids in their service, and I'm with her. Somehow having a family venue creates a separate but not really equal second class citizenship. She was ready to go home. Despite the fact we had by now missed any chance at some hip cool mega church corporate worship, and despite the fact that I had a pretty good idea of the sermon content (they were kicking off forty days of purpose, and I've already read the book). We went to the family venue late. My wife was greeted, my kids were not. We walked into a tent with some tables where families were coloring together while "Everybody loves Raymond" played on the big screen. There were no seats at the tables so we sat on the school chairs (the family venue is housed in what is normally the junior high venue) and tried to take in the sermon. I was laughing at how Pastor Rick kept saying "tonight" until I realized we were not watching a live feed but simply a recording from the Saturday night service. I left to take the boy to the restroom, it's outside in a different temporary building. The wife was waiting for me when I came out, she really was ready to go home. We picked up the baby and went back to the tram pick-up and waited until we realized the tram was broke. We then hiked back the way we had came past all the tents over the bridge and down the elevator to the lower lot where we had originally parked.

I was a little dissapointed. I have some fairly random thoughts and one that I think is monumental.

Random thoughts...

How does one of the most influential preachers in America get away with repeating a series everybody knows he already did.

The Junior high venue was really cool! It pretty much sucked as a family venue, but it was the coolest middle school tent ever. I was having youth pastor envy.

I'm still a little bummed I didn't get my free copy of The Purpose Driven Life. I have the hardback but I'm a sucker for a great deal.

Somehow it made me feel better that big church, rich, baptists, from Orange County deal with the same stuff we do, seating, stuff breaking, what to do with kids, etc.

There was about a hundred people in the family venue, counting all the kids. No one looked too excited to be there, except one couple sitting in front of us and the sound guy who is for sure one of those people who just loves what ever they are doing.

I was once again reminded and impressed by the efforts of this church in addressing the AIDS crisis.

4 out of 20 cars in the parking lot were beamers. I didn't count Mercedes, Land Rovers, or Hummers, but 20% had a little BMW emblem. I'm not sure why I noticed this.

MONUMENTAL THOUGHTS

People have to be more important than programs. Relationships have to be more important than rules. No one ever told me their name. The nursery lady was the only person who ever asked me mine. I wonder how new people feel when they show up at my church? I don't want to knock Saddleback, that operation is a massive logisistical undertaking, and I was impressed with the shear volume of people that showed up, and the small army of staff and volunteers that it takes to make weekend services happen. I just wonder if many other families have had a similair experience, maybe it was their first ever church experience. I hope it wasn't their last. I'm reading this book... Everything Must Change. And that's what I'm thinking.

Broken

Barna research has released some pretty significant findings in regards to how 16-29 yr olds feel about Christianity. Yeah, I know. I barely made the research group. Here is what they found;

The new study shows that only 3% of 16 - to 29-year-old non-Christians express favorable views of evangelicals.

Common negative perceptions include that present-day Christianity is judgmental (87%), hypocritical (85%), old-fashioned (78%), and too involved in politics (75%) - representing large proportions of young outsiders who attach these negative labels to Christians.

When young people were asked to identify their impressions of Christianity, one of the common themes was "Christianity is changed from what it used to be" and "Christianity in today’s society no longer looks like Jesus."

But then, as we probed why young people had come to such conclusions, I was surprised how much their perceptions were rooted in specific stories and personal interactions with Christians and in churches.

I think maybe the church is doing something wrong. Check out the whole article here.

TOO MUCH!

I am feeling too much. I am doing too much. I am thinking about too much. I need peace. I need quiet. I need simplicity. I need a vacation.

Oh yeah, I just learned that my vacation will be cut short if I want to go to the Twin Cities. Why is everything in my life so connected yet so compartmentalized?

Changing Seasons

New things in my life...
started campus ministry at the high school
started campus ministry at the middle school
started after school small groups
started fall volleyball league
started Friday night "5th Quarter"
started Men's monday night football fellowship

Things that ended recently...
Sunday's relaxed Traditional Service dress code

At least when Brown worked you around the clock, you got paid a little bit more. Don't worry. I'm not getting bitter. It's all good. It all just seems a little overwhelming right now.

Topherspoon will be preaching on Sunday the 23rd. 6PM.

It's Not ACTUALLY our Anniversary...

Until September 23rd. Since I'm preaching that night and taking students to Six Flags the day before, we celebrated this weekend. Just me, the wife, the Ashe Cabin, and no kids. No Blogging. No Internet. No movies. NoTV. It was fantastic. I beat my high score for Dig Dug on my wifes phone... twice. I finally finished Freedom of Simplicity by Foster and also Things You Should Know by Now by Jason Boyett.

Spent lots of time with the wife. Drank lots of coffee. Ate half a gallon of Ice Cream, and slept often.

I also had time to re-evaluate some goals I made at the begining of the year.

Here are the dissapointments....
It's after Labor Day and I weigh more than 250 lbs. I have not taken the classes I planned to and I have not been disciplined in my good eating habits or my walking. I have yet to make it to a local youth pastors gathering this year. I'm half way to my bro's 08 b-day and I am not half way done with my Bible reading. My debt is just as overwhelming as it was before and I still wish I made more time for the wife and kids. While blogging quite a bit, I have not submitted any articles or manuscripts to anybody.

Here's the good news...
I have made huge steps in the way I value relationships. I feel like things are good with the wife and each of my kids. While I haven't attended too many meetings, I have stayed fairly connected by email, phone, and blogging to several friends, local youth pastors, guys in my fellowship, and also emerging circles. I made three book club meetings and am looking forward to what's next for that unique group. I feel like I have been being mentored and am also mentoring others. I go to bed earlier and wake up earlier. I have a more regular schedule that usually involves breakfast. I've read a ton of books this year. I am managing my time better, and I am in the process of implementing some good changes in our youth ministry. It has been a struggle, but I have been intentional in keeping student ministry the prioity in what I do for the church. I have taken some fairly significant steps towards one day planting a church. I feel like my bro is more healthy and more at peace than he was at the begining of this year, and I feel like I had a part in this.

Conclusion.
I want to value PEOPLE not programs or policy. I want to value RELATIONSHIPS not rules and regiment. This has been a healthy good change in my life. This has been difficult and time consuming. This goes against what I used to be, and goes against the functional practicality of the culture I live in. There were events that I could not have planned for that impacted my health, time commitments, financial commitments, and ability to meet all of these goals. I am still a largely undisciplined, weak, imperfect person who becomes overwhelmed easily and often finds accomplishment in doing the least effort required. I am still a part of a local church that schedules so much ministry and outreach that sometimes I feel like there is little time left for any real ministry or outreach. My goals were good goals. I will continue to work towards them.

A Poem by Edward Everett Hale

I am only one,
But still I am one.
I cannot do everything
But still I can do something;
And because I cannot do everything
I will not refuse to do the something that I can do.

This poem is just one paragraph from the 10 page packet I created that is being looked over by the elders of my church this weekend. Yesterday was a bizzare day. Exciting. Scary. Terrifying. All at the same time. In a sense I feel relieved. In a sense I feel nervous.

Cool poem huh?

Catching Up with Family... What do you love about your church?

Hung out with the old Spoons on Friday. Caught up with bro-in-law J.P. and his girlfriend on Saturday. Had an intervention meeting with cousin Matt on Sunday. Wonder who I'll see today.

So in my recent series of questions about church, there have been alot of "things that shouldn't matter but do" (like including the word valley in your church name). Today's question is more meaningful and positive. What do you love about your church? Is it the pastor's speaking? the really cool name? the correct doctrinal statement? the events? your small group? the coffee shop in the foyer? the kids program? the friendly parking attendants? Besides "feeling called" and "being committed", what keeps you where you are?

I apologize to those who don't currently have a "home church" or who are pursuing fellowship in less traditional means. I would be interested in your thoughts as well. What do you think folks desire as far as a community of faith?

Here is what I love about my church...
On Sunday Matt was dropped off at my church at 1:03PM ( I happened to glance at my phone). Church had been out for about a half hour and many people were lingering, visiting with each other, making lunch plans, etc. Matt and I got in the van and headed out to pick up some diapers and lunch. While we were at Super Target picking up diapers we ran into a family who are a part of our church. After normal chit chat, inviting their middle schooler to our September events and hearing about there soon to be born grand daughter we moved on to the infant/toddler section. After debating the cost difference between the 29 pack and the 44 pack, moving to the counter, paying and heading to the car, I was given a huge unsuspecting hug from Alberto, a boy in my son's class at church. I waved to his folks and exited the store. On our way to get lunch, I was sitting at a light across from a young couple in our church I had the priveledge of marrying. I waved to them and turned right. We went to the drive through at Del Taco to grab lunch which took a long time. Sitting in the drive through allowed some subsational time for Matt to really fill me in on some of the circumstances he is facing. Things were getting fairly intense when he says "Do you know those people, becuase I think they know you." I look over to see four young adults from our church making faces and waving from inside the restaurant. I did my best to introduce evryone through the window, got our food, and dropped diapers and lunch off at the house before taking Matt to my office.

At one point in our conversation, Matt says. "I just think life should be about relationships." I said "I agree, but the most important relationship is with our creator. In fact Christianity is supposed to be all about relationship." We talked about some of the foundational differences between Christianity and some other faiths. Finally Matt says, "I see that here." I asked what he meant and he says. "Ever since I got here, Everyone has been waving to you!"

Pray ( if you're the praying type) that Matt finds more helpful meaningful relationships. And feel free to leave your own thoughts. What do you love about your church?

What's in a Name?

Topherspoon has been in a funk. The lack of comments on TTSM suggest Topherspoon's readers may be in a funk too. Topherspoon is trying to answer alot of hard questions, many only he can answer. Topherspoon is starting some hypothetical research about churches. Topherspoon would love to hear your input.

For my entire life I have attended churches that have "Assembly" in their name. If you were to name a church what would you name it? An "Assembly", a "Fellowship", or simply a "Church"? Would you be a "Center"? Would you include regional distinctives? denominational distinctives? How bout biblical or historical references? Would you use the word "Christian"? Or be something abstract like a bridge, a grove, a river, a porch, or a shoe?

How important is nomenclature to the unchurched, unreached?

Today didn't Suck.

Funniest thing I heard today.

So where Are you going for your honeymoon? Texas. Why Texas?
I have to meet my mother-in-law.

Sometimes I think I'm so cool, and emergent, and cutting edge. Let me just admit, I'm the biggest dork on the planet! In spite of that, I am blessed with wonderful friends. I serve a wonderful church with the best students anywhere. My wife is the most gracious, compassionate, and caring person on the planet, and she's beautiful (and she has a pretty good eye for photos). My kids rock. Oh yeah, my kid's uncles are pretty cool too.

I survived today and things went better than I thought they would.

Doing what I love

Just in case I start getting concerned calls from my previous post... The "Holy Sweat" Trip was fantastic. The students did wonderful. We touched the lives of about 40 unique children over four nights and helped families connect with a wonderful church, South Bay Christian Fellowship. We passed out nearly 1,000 fliers in a community with a population of about 14,000. I saw first hand some of the challenges of ministering in a small coastal community but only 14,000? It gives some hope to the "Let's see the whole city saved" kind of vision casting. It was very refreshing though to hear Pastor Dan's heart and know that this body is all about building big people, not neccesarily a big church. I got to lead and watch six high school students introduce Jesus to little kids and be divine encouragement to an 86 year old lady. I saw these six diverse and unique individuals become a team and begin actually being the church. We shared many meals together, got to hang with sea otters in the bay, prayed together under a pygmy oak tree, and saw some crazy things from the windows of a '75 Crown bus. This is discipleship how I like it.

My wife is my hero! Again and Again and Again. When I feel like I'm getting old, maybe burnt out, and grumpy she is always there, hearing His voice, being an advocate for students, and seeing the need in ways that I either can't or just don't. Oh yeah, my kids are the best! And that is why I hauled three goldfish (prizes from the kids extravaganza) 300 miles in plastic bags they were in for 30 hours. I can't believe they are still alive! But they are. They are eating beta food in a bowl on my kitchen counter.

Reflections on Camp... Liability... and Grilling Burgers.

So last week I promised some updates on camp. Here's one. Sometimes as a youth pastor one experiences moments of true delight that seem like "heaven on earth" and make all the crap of the job worth it. Many times they are super spiritual and sometimes their not. Last week I had the joy of once again running all the afternoon activities at camp. A camp favorite, and the most stressful for the activities director, is boating. We rent these little 4-6 seat outboard aluminum fishing boats and the campers get to drive them and go exploring on the lake for one hour. I ALWAYS tell them not to crash other boats, not to "fall" into the water, and not to come back late. After a decade of doing this I anticipate all of these things happening. So last week I sent out nine boats of campers and workers, ALL NINE CAME BACK ON TIME! Most of them were soaked from "falling" in and I know they were playing bumper boats but the fact that they all came back on time, just might be my crowning achievement in youth ministry... (plus, like my bro, I teach good, just not English). The only problem was I went three times to pick up the scenic chair lift hikers before I figured out they must be really lost. Everyone was safely back at camp by the end of dinner but losing three campers and two counselors really but a damper on my "having punctual boaters" celebration.

Earlier this year, we made a big change in our church policy. We decided to let 18 year olds attend the young adults class... even if they were still in high school. It always cracks me up when the church makes rules for adults to follow. Anyway, it has been very helpful for this group to come up with some appropriate guidelines for defining their group; 18-30, not married, no kids allowed. But somehow in this change, and in these definitions, there arose a huge misunderstanding about what to do with my seniors who just graduated from high school who happen to be 17 still. (It's the same fall birthday Kindergarten thing) To me, it seemed simple... let them go to young adults. However, me and the young adults leader did not see eye to eye right away. There was this huge question about liability and legal minors. (Here comes a rant) I know the folks at Guide One and Church Mutual probably hate me, but I send kids out on rented boats, I treat 17 year old graduates like adults, and while I'm at it... I let kids skate in the church parking lot. PEOPLE must come before POLICY. (ok, end of rant). In the end, everyone is doing things my way, but I still don't understand why it was a hard decision.

Today was the Summer Heat Volleyball tournament. I'm always nervous when there is a church sponsored event and I don't have a job assignment going into it. Today was fantastic though! I did very little except chill with my kids and watch some pretty exciting volleyball. Nothing quite like changin' diapers under an EZ-UP while sippin' on a diet mountain dew. I did end up spending much of the afternoon behind the grill, but that too is very relaxing to me. The smell of smoke, the burn in the eyes, and the sizzling sounds of grease dripping past the grill onto the coals; not a bad way to spend a sabbath, although technically, I'm pretty sure I was working.

Tomorrow should be great. Our church is hosting a group of kids from Los Osos, CA (four hours north) and another group from Gilbert, AZ (four hours east). They will be sleeping on our floor tomorrow night and heading up to camp with us on Monday morning. Sounds like fun!

Why is Kindergarten such a difficult word to spell?

I know what a "garden" is but what's a "garten"? What does "kinder" mean anyway?

So my oldest turns five on December 1st, just one day before the public school deadline for starting school. This means my wife and I recently reopened the fall birthday when do you start school controversy. Let me tell you, everyone has an opinion about this (If for some reason you don't I highly recommend forming one right away). Everyone thinks it's a very important question. And there is nothing close to popular consensus as far as what's best. My wife and I had separate experiences and we both ended up ok. She was out of high school for five months before she became a legal adult. I turned legal three months into my senior year. Like I said, we both ended up okay, but this is not valid because boys and girls are different and you can't just think about today, or even graduation day, the critical time is middle school. Let me say that even during middle school I was smarter, bigger, and more socially competent than all my friends. However, I still failed the presidential fitness test, those tall girls with breast still freaked me out, and I still did not understand why telemarketers kept asking if I was the lady of the house. Middle School sucks doesn't it? So for the sake of being like me (shouldn't everyone?) we were going to let the boy start school later, we had decided this a long time ago and began making life plans around this decision.

All that being said, I think everyone would understand why I became emotionally unstable when my wife reopened the discussion by saying... "I think we should put him in kindergarten." She said this with a real seriousness like God Himself had spoken to her... so I began with the internet research and phone calls. I learned way more than I wanted. Did you know the grade known as K is changing all over our nation? Ever since W's "No Child Left Behind" It's pretty much mandatory that you grasp algebra, dissect pigs, and read Hamlet before you even think about moving to first grade. I discovered that some states have made K all day (that's right no AM or PM options ALL DAY!) and there's a conspiracy to do the same thing in California. (If you are a resident please write Feinstein and Boxer and express your outrage). On top of all these paradoxes I'm finding, there's "promotion Sunday" coming at church and it seems all the boy's buddies are going to the big kid class. I don't want my son to feel left behind (no credit should be given to Tim LaHaye, Mr Jenkins or Kirk Cameron. I'm not talking about the books or the movies). What do I do?!

"There is no good reason to start kid's early", says one person I trust. "You're pretty much be robbing him of his childhood" is the impression I got from someone else. "He will be the youngest in his class... forever" is the truth ringing in my ears. I have to tell you, I extremely appreciated the response of Mr. G. He prefaced his opinion like this "either way, I don't think you are going to screw him up".

What about mom? Surely she would like a break? Making two trips a day to a different place with two kids in the car and one coming to or from class...yeah, that sounds like a break. I know three is hard, let me remove the one who is actually helpful, is that better? No easy answers here either.

So here's the verdict... The boy is starting school... home school... part of a public charter school. This means he starts learning with out the classroom adjustment stuff. We can play the K or pre-K card however we like. It seems not all his church buddies are promoting so maybe we'll avoid stealing his childhood for the time being. This also delays the real decision to next year. You know, a lot can happen in a year. He'll probably just start Kindergarten a year from now. He won't have any classmates going to the first grade. So how will he know if he's being "held back"? I really don't want him to carry the shame of being "held back". However, if the kid is doing Shakespeare and Trig a year from now (I hear the curriculum is very advanced), we'll probably just let him start middle school next fall... I'll just have to talk to him about the ladies.

Preach'n on a Sunday Night!

Tonight I spoke on simplicity. Launched out of Judges 6-8 and the story of Gideon. Less is more. Trust God. Glorify Him. I actually had a lot of fun telling the story of Gideon and challenging folks to critically look at some of our modern conveniences. The whole application point really boiled down to Security, Storage, and Simplicity. Maybe that would of been a better title than the simply put "Less is more".

Some surprise congregants...

my boss... Was scheduled to be on vacation but stayed home and came to church. Told me, "less is more, you went for nearly 50 minutes". Interesting comment from a guy that talked about being careful with your tongue this morning. What was up with that?

my mom... Was in Laughlin all week end and had some real challenges. I didn't think she would stop by for a long winded preacher on her way home. Momma didn't say much but you know she loved it...That's just how mommas are.

my bro... came on his own to the church where we both grew up. This meant a lot to me. Some possibly well intentioned folks made some fairly judgemental comments and I'm pretty frustrated. T-Spoon had some very nice things to say about appreciating what I do, ... regardless of these people.

HERE'S THE RANT!

Tonight I felt like I had to apologize to my brother for the stupid things other people said. I also felt like I had to express my own gratitude for him making the physical, financial, and emotional effort to be in church and hear me preach. I felt like I had to clarify that I don't personally agree with this "If you died tonight..." approach to evangelism and also voice my own frustrations about people's (especially christian people's) inability to just be nice and love people with out coming across like "I'm better than you... and you could be better too... if you were just like me". I said all these things and I never prefaced my questions with "I just have to ask" or added the addendum "I had to say that", or inserted into my offerings of our conversation any other excusatory parenthetical clauses. Why? Because if you have to say, "I just had to say" You're wrong. You didn't have to. And further more... you should not have. No way! You need to allow the redemptive love of Jesus to come through you. This, "us and them", "in or out", reductionism is not working. It's time to try something new!

END OF RANT

The night was redeemed when my mom and bro both came over for some family fun that involved chicken, macaroni, black beans, karaoke revolution, and three happy toddlers. It was a pretty good day.

Death by Suburbia?

My brother hates suburbia. Super Target, Applebees, and Krispy Kreme would not be high on his list of what is needed where he wants to live. I actually kinda like these retail establishments, but my bro and I have had some great discussions about the "toxicity" of suburbia, the felt safety that seems to stealing life out of the very beings of our friends, family, and society.

I was at a birthday party last night and the five year old birthday boy got a really awesome skate board from his parents. The sweet old lady (who I love dearly), sitting right behind me, shouts, "Where's the helmet? He'll likely kill himself". I remember riding in the back of a van pre-seat-belt-law days (oh the good ol days). I remember going down scalding hot aluminum slides and hanging on monkey bars that had gravel under them. I remember when only the geeks wore helmets and Nintendo didn't exist. In a sorta old guy skepticism I have a hard time believing anyone is safer. In fact, I could pose some pretty good arguments to why our kids are not better off!

I see a trend among young families getting out of suburbia and purposefully moving to smaller spaces in more urban areas... places where their kids might be less safe but you can walk to get a gallon of milk... Places where art, music, and diversity are a little more accessible.

There are quite a few books recently published that deal with how suburbia is affecting our lives, and even our perceptions of Jesus. One is by David Goetze , who was recently interviewed by Cutting Edge magazine. Here are some excerpts that spoke to me.

"the journey is one of simultaneously becoming distant from our culture, and at the same time deeply belonging to it in order to serve it"

"the answer is not to leave the suburbs but to stay and figure it out, and find Jesus there"

"so the thicker life in my thinking means a life filled with joy, that embraces suffering, that exhibits the fruits of the Spirit"

I think I may be called to be a suburban missionary. Is it possible to live a missional life in suburban culture? Any Thoughts?

We heaped a bunch of rocks!

There's this passage in the Hebrew scriptures. God's chosen people are being pursued by an enemy and the Jordan river flows between them and freedom. According to the scriptures, the river drives up just as the priest carrying the ark of the covenant set foot in the water and then God's people walk across on dry land. Once everyone crossed, God tells His people to make a heap of rocks, 12 to be specific. The rocks were to be a monument, a reminder of what God had done. The rocks were an inspiration for future generations.

Yesterday the church where I serve celebrated it's 20th anniversary. This is the church I grew up in. I was there in the early years, for 10 years before leaving to help at a church plant. We've been back for five years already. All that to say, this 20 year history largely connects to my own history, story, and testimony. Through all the challenges and frustrations, it has been a wonderful ride and I am so thankful for the foundation that has been built in my life. It is a joy to serve where I grew up, and to be a part of an exciting future full of wonderful changes, new births, and I'm sure, more challenges and frustrations.
It was a blast to show my kids the pictures of when their Daddy was ten and building a church, or having class in a bus, or eating outside at our camp (that now has a beautiful indoor dining hall). It was a joy to introduce them to old friends and to let them hear and share in the old stories. It was almost like they were asking... "Hey Dad, What's up with those rocks by the river?" I thoughly enjoyed the weekend celebration.

Mixing Metaphors...Sheep Poop?

A wise pastor once told me that there's something all Shepherds deal with. Despite my strong desire to further use alliteration I will describe this something as sheep poop. In fact there's actually a pastoral ministry book I hope to read one day titled "They smell like sheep". I think both the author of this book and the wise pastor are speaking to the idea that effective pastors must be around, hang out with, and walk through things with their people, even the difficult and unpleasant things. I agree and hope this "sheep smell" is a mark of my ministry.

But as I wrestle further with my own thoughts on grace and leadership, I realize leading people is much more difficult than controlling people. Better by far... But much more difficult by far. Often in discussions with my boss and fellow staff members there is a resistance to change... a fear of failure ... a pre-tense of being careful ... and an intentional level of what might be seen as micro management. I know this comes from a burden of responsibility to protect the sheep. From what I'm not sure, but I understand the motivation and think it's admirable. However, I've come to find myself repeatedly saying in these discussions "I'm not sure how it's gonna work. It might be messy. But it ought to be good." or something to that effect.

"It might be messy"... this is the phrase that caused be to start mixing my metaphors. It might be messy like sheep sh...(uh)...poop. Should we as pastors "protect" our people by keeping them away from poop?

How would you do this with sheep? Know that I have thought through this thoroughly, but am a poor illustrator, so as much as I would like to share some of the pictures I've come up with I will stick to writing, and leave this to your imagination.

The only real way to prevent sheep from pooping is to stop feeding them. This is not a good option for a shepherd...or a pastor. In fact, it's amazing that the healthy by product of being fed becomes a blessing to the sheep later as it fertilizes the ground they are eating from! I hope my sheep poop small amounts from being fed just right. I hope the messes they make can be "cleaned up" in such as way that they are a blessing to others and even themselves. I hope I never wake up to a ministry with out poop.

Did I take this too far? Any Thoughts?