Saturday, May 17, 2008

Marriage, My Mom, My Mentors, & Music

In John Eldridge's WILD AT HEART he suggests that every male is longing to answer the same question... Do I have what it takes?

As we settle into our recent monumental changes, I ask this question often. Being a husband, dad, pastor. Do I have what it takes?

Diligence. Faithfulness. Consistency.

Those are the three words for this new season. Three concepts I'm longing to understand better. Three attributes I want my kids to see in me. Three causes I wish the Church would wear better.

My wife is the best. I can't imagine living this adventure with anyone else. She has sacrificed so much in answering this call. When my time is in such high demand, I know our time is often what I neglect. Saying "I'm sorry" seems like an understatement and insufficient expression of my heart. I am hopeful for her to somehow know peace and quiet in a house with three small children.

My mom is a special lady. How do you forget to call your mom on her 55th birthday? Is that a symptom of overwhelming changes or a well meaning compliment? As we celebrated Mom's day at church Sunday, I was reminded of how my mom continues to go out of her way to make my life better, easier, and more meaningful. I can only hope she sees the grace and redemption in the legacy that is our family.

I was so encouraged to meet with a group of pastors this week; my peers, mentors, and friends. No one pointed out my failures. No one said "You shoulda...". They prayed for me. They acted like this little church plant in West Phoenix was the most exciting thing happening anywhere. And many of them drove a great distance to do so.

I struggle with creativity. Part of me longs to be an artist, a poet, a musician. Often people in those vocations frustrate me, yet I am envious inside. You may not know this, but from 6th grade - high school graduation I played Trombone. Marching Band, Jazz Band, Offertory Orchestra at church... that was me. I never really over achieved in any of these ( I got awards like "most improved" and ""most inspirational"), but I always enjoyed the social outlet of hanging out with musicians. There's always been something inside me that has great respect for those who can create expressions of beauty. Most recently I am impressed once again by Cobalt Season. Their new Song Time Will Tell resonates with some of what I'm feeling. You could listen on their myspace and check out the lyrics if you are interested. (By the way, I am biased towards the trombone accompaniment)

Diligence. Faithfulness. Consistency.
I am thankful for those listed above who have demonstrated these to me.

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